Thursday, 7th, April, 2011. A full day of work. Stopping and starting, the people emptying the bins full of fruit making mistakes with the variety, the graders mixing up the qualities. The effects of incompetency like ripples in water. Others mistakes experienced by everyone. I wondered how much Trevelyan lost while 300 people just stood around not working.
I ran home again, it’s become an easy task now. The challenge now is to make myself run faster. In a way it’s easier to slog my guts out at first, completely unfit, even a light jog made me feel sick and exhausted, at least then I just had to keep going where as now I can keep a decent pace without any hassle, it’s so much harder mentally to push it to the next level and start running fast as opposed to keeping in my comfort zone.
I was stationed next to Sebastian today, a zingy young man from Argentina, he has a Mohican and I am sure a case of attention deficit disorder. He makes boxes in a tornado of activity. I look in his eyes screaming “WHY CANT I MAKE THESE STUPID THINGS FASTER!?” then when he has made a whole platoon of the things he accosts another liner and chats with them animatedly. “When I finish work I feel anxious, I take a few hours to calm down from all the noise and movement” Sebastian said. I agreed that after work I also felt slightly on edge from the constant movement and the noise. I realized that now that I have stopped drinking I need to find other ways to relax, even if alcohol was a ham fisted way about relaxing it was at least instant.