Friday, 26th, march, 2010.  My grade four students at Jin Pan school where
unusually naughty today. One student who walked past my desk picked up my ruler
and threw it on the floor. I shouted at him to pick it up and after grabbing
him by the arm and forcing him back to where he threw it, he picked it up, gave
me a filthy look and bent it out of shape. I really wanted to hit him. The shit
excuse for a class teacher lamely told him “that’s my ruler why did you do
that?” I taught this class and in general after scaring the living daylights
out of them they started to be better behaved. My teenage middle school student
where a pleasure to teach today. We ran over the poems which are in the text
nook. The book which at first I thought was abysmal has actually been great. It’s
a blessing in disguise because it’s got no structure so I just pick out a line
in a poem or a short essay in the book and work on that for the whole lesson. It’s
more organic and fun than the structured classes at Shuang Dao School.


I had a sleep for an hour back home and
when I woke up I caught myself in mid sentence shouting at Sarah “where’s the bed
sheet!?” The bed sheet was in the bed with me. I seem to remember from my dream
it was imperative I got the magic sheet, or something like that. I must have
been sleep talking. Ah I remember now I needed the magic sheet to hang over the
hole in the door way, so that the demons could not get though. Sarah was
laughing at me from the other room. She has been subjected to many of my little
sleep talking episodes.


Later I went to the Shuang Dao School and taught
the two middle school classes. It was abysmal. They were all so despondent and
shitty. It was Friday afternoon so they probably just wanted to get out. I made
fun of one of the students when he was being silly and I immediately regretted
it. I could not stop myself. He was flopping around on his chair and shouting
so I told him to be quiet and he said “yeah man”, in his ridiculous Chinese accent,
I mimicked him in front of the class and everyone laughed at him. I could not
help myself. I know you shouldn’t mock your students but I had no control over
my body, ah well it’s not a big thing but I will try not to do it again. I
really hate the students sometimes, they just seem so stupid, boring and rude
and simple. I don’t have the feeling that I really care if they learn or not. I
really do not care. I just want them to be quiet and not cause trouble and
distract the ones who actually want to work.


In the evening I had another lesson at the
new window school with Mr Lin. Today we talked about religion in China. Mr.Lin
told me that although a lot of people go through the motions of traditional, Buddhist
or confusion or Taoist ceremonies, very few people these day actually believe
in anything or know anything about them. People just go thought the ceremonies
without the respect or knowledge of where the ceremony comes from. It must be
to do with the Communists, China has a long history and many traditions but
when Mao set out on his cultural revolution and the spiritual pollution campaigns,
many of Chinas ceremonies were banned and fell out of practice. Now that
control has loosened many ceremonies are being practiced again but it’s not the
same, there was a hiccup in history and respect and tradition has for a large
part been replaced by greed and ignorance about Chinese peoples own culture. I
have seen so many people just go through the motions of ceremonies but without
the heart behind it.


I was happy when the lesson was over, Mr
Lins wife who is from Mongolia drove me back home and I fell asleep very fast
when I got back.

One thought on “PART60

  1. – When us Cushing kids shared a bedroom I used to have many a chat with your Mum while she was asleep. Who’d have thought it was genetic?

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